Top Five Worst Christmas Songs

The consensus is in, there is no arguing with it. The science is settled as Al Gore is fond of saying.

Brought to you by the home office in Frankenmuth, Michigan.

Number Five: Last Christmas by Wham.



Last Christmas, she broke George Micheal's heart so this Christmas he is giving it to someone special. Someone special apparently is whoever it is that shuffles his feet in the bathroom stall next to him.

Number Four: Grandma Got Ran Over By A Reindeer.



It's just silly, sad and-- after the second time-- annoying as Rosie O'Donnell, Roseanne Barr and Joy Behar merged into one horrific creature who became your mother-in-law.

Number Three: Wonderful Christmas Time by Paul McCartney and Wings.



It sounds exactly like it was made. On a home studio in 1979.

Nothing wrong with home studios today. With a good computer and sound mixer, a person can make a CD quality song or two.

It's not like McCartney couldn't afford to bring this into a real studio and polish it up. The problem is that he didn't and-- being how no one can say "No" to a former Beatle-- we are stuck with this.

Number Two: Happy Xmas (War Is Over) by John Lennon and Some Shrieking Succubus.



Because there is nothing worse than a celebrity preaching.

The melody is alright, it's the lyrics that gave this song the number two spot.

And the number one worst Christmas Song is: Do They Know It's Christmas by Band Aid (various artists, AKA, whoever was free at the time and needed a boost in their career or wanted to satisfy the Public Service Announcement condition of their parole).



Because if there is one thing worse than one celebrity preaching it's a chorus of celebrities preaching.

Honorable mention is Faith Hill with Where Are You Christmas. I didn't want to make a top six and a top ten would have been too many videos for one post. Besides, it will leave me open to put 'The Grinch' in the Top Five Worst Christmas movies for next year.

The New Green Enemy Is. . . Backyard Grilling?

For the love of Pete (Link to the New York Times. Fair warning).

FOOD is responsible for 10 to 30 percent of global greenhouse gas emissions. By many estimates, cooking represents more of a meal’s carbon footprint than transport. For certain vegetables, it accounts for more emissions than agriculture, transport and disposal combined.

Fourth of July, the national celebration of combustion, presents an opportunity for atonement.

I’m not advising you to forsake grilling this holiday and join the ranks of raw-foodists. Nor do I believe that we can reverse climate change by eating burgers rare instead of well done. But a little creative thinking can reduce this year’s Fourth of July carbon emissions without gustatory sacrifice. And maybe that awareness will carry into other days and other parts of our lives.

Consider potato salad: a pale mixture of boiled potatoes and mayonnaise that is sometimes appetizing but always wasteful. An overwhelming majority of the energy in boiling goes into heating the water rather than cooking the potatoes.
[. . .]
Now for the burgers and dogs. First, a green disclaimer. Beef is an environmental disaster, no matter how you cook it. However, if you can’t resist grilled cow, your big decision is between charcoal and propane.

And it goes downhill from there.

It starts here. Then some more people will pick up on this and eventually make it's way into the city or state legislator. A bill will be presented requiring permits to buy grills. For the good of the planet, it will be explained. New York City tried to ban salt in prepared foods not too long ago. Would a ban on grills be that far fetched?

But because liberals are really tyrants at heart and 'Going Green' is merely another way to control you life, your diet and your habits.

That only gave me an excuse to show off my Father's Day present:

It's been put to good use too. The first time I tried it out was with chicken quarters and country style ribs:

Tonight it was plain old Beer Can Chicken on the grill:

I also have several slabs of ribs needing to be smoked and a pork shoulder waiting to be cooked low and slow so I would imagine that the carbon offset from those will be huge.

What are you grilling up for this holiday weekend?

Video: Our Heros

Not to get too sappy but this did make it a little difficult to see my monitor.



Remember to thank those that served.

Happy Mother's Day

I may have missed the point of Mother's Day with this selection.

As We Look Back At 2010. . . A Retrospective Of The Best And The Worst, Depending On Your Point Of View

As my stomach slowly starts to return to it's normal size after a New Year's Eve gorging, it's time to do the annual look back on the that was.

• The Democrats took a beating. And there was much rejoicing and pudding being violated.
• Former Sen. John Edwards is a deadbeat. But there's nothing new about that.
• James Cameron is an egotistical narcissist among egotistical narcissists.
• Al Gore is inconveniently single again.
• Yes, the United Nations continues to be a joke.
• And Ezra Klein continues to illustrate how overrated he actually is.

No predictions other than Obama will shift from blaming Pres. Bush to blaming the House of Representatives.

And if this doesn't count toward the news of the weird, it should count towards someone who is highly suspect.

Wishing everyone had a Merry Christmas and here is to a New Year.

Update: Linked by an Old Retired Petty Officer.

Friday Night Christmas Carol With She & Him

Zooey Deschanel-- much like Frank and Deano-- makes it sound rather effortless.

Friday Night Christmas Carol

Tonight, I stepped aside and let my wife pick out the song.

Saturday Season's Greetings

Don't let the 'Hitman' graphic fool you, it's an amazing version of Ave Maria.

I've heard the song during the holidays enough that I'm counting it as one.

If I Do One Christmas PSA This Year. . .

It's this: How to gift wrap your cat.

Happy Thanksgiving

I thought it appropriate to include George Washington's Thanksgiving declaration.

Whereas it is the duty of all nations to acknowledge the providence of Almighty God, to obey His will, to be grateful for His benefits, and humbly to implore His protection and favor; and Whereas both Houses of Congress have, by their joint committee, requested me to "recommend to the people of the United States a day of public thanksgiving and prayer, to be observed by acknowledging with grateful hearts the many and signal favors of Almighty God, especially by affording them an opportunity peaceably to establish a form of government for their safety and happiness:"

Now, therefore, I do recommend and assign Thursday, the 26th day of November next, to be devoted by the people of these States to the service of that great and glorious Being who is the beneficent author of all the good that was, that is, or that will be; that we may then all unite in rendering unto Him our sincere and humble thanks for His kind care and protection of the people of this country previous to their becoming a nation; for the signal and manifold mercies and the favorable interpositions of His providence in the course and conclusion of the late war; for the great degree of tranquility, union, and plenty which we have since enjoyed; for the peaceable and rational manner in which we have been enable to establish constitutions of government for our safety and happiness, and particularly the national one now lately instituted for the civil and religious liberty with which we are blessed, and the means we have of acquiring and diffusing useful knowledge; and, in general, for all the great and various favors which He has been pleased to confer upon us.

And also that we may then unite in most humbly offering our prayers and supplications to the great Lord and Ruler of Nations and beseech Him to pardon our national and other transgressions; to enable us all, whether in public or private stations, to perform our several and relative duties properly and punctually; to render our National Government a blessing to all the people by constantly being a Government of wise, just, and constitutional laws, discreetly and faithfully executed and obeyed; to protect and guide all sovereigns and nations (especially such as have shown kindness to us), and to bless them with good governments, peace, and concord; to promote the knowledge and practice of true religion and virtue, and the increase of science among them and us; and, generally to grant unto all mankind such a degree of temporal prosperity as He alone knows to be best.

Given under my hand, at the city of New York, the 3d day of October, A.D. 1789.

And for the traditionalists, The Daley Gator had A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving.

For Those Of You Who Have Served

Thank you. It's two little words and it barely scratches the surface in terms of gratitude for what this country owes you for your service.

And for this day of thanks to veterans, Smitty over at The Other McCain's habitat has signaled that he'll be on duty for a year. He's heading for a land that's arid and dry and-- worst of all-- no access to broadband for the better part of a year. Safe journey.

Best of all, he has a bit of Gaelic up that really needs to be checked out. If only to see how this fits: Come, you sons of hounds, and I will give you flesh.

I was going to play this in Smitty's honor but then realized he would be more at home with this:

Happy Halloween

Quoth the raven, "Nevermore."



I've listened to a version of this done by Willem Dafoe some time ago but after reviewing it, itm wasn't the same version of the poem. It was a concept album by Lou Reed and the lines were re-written for the studio version. As to why? I don't know. But it should be a crime to mess with a classic. Other than that, the Dafoe version is wicked good despite the departure from the classic lines.

Happy Bastille Day

Not sure what is other than Wiki's entry about it. French independence or something like that. I missed that day in Western Civilization.

But it does give me an excuse to play this by Rush.

Happy Independence Day

Image credit to Little Miss Attila.

For This Memorial Day

It's refreshing to hear a song like this come out of a public school.



The sheet music for this is being offered for free if you are so inclined.

Besides, how endearing is it to hear kids sing about thanking our soldiers?

At least it wasn't some creepy and cult-like Obama Tribute that other schools have done. Hmmm, hmmm, hmmm.

UPDATE: Linked by The Other McCain, P & P and The House of Eratosthenes.

How I Spent My Earth Day

I was the one with the drum.

On This Earth Day It's Important To Remember. . .

. . . Not everything from the earth is good. There is an evil that lies below.







The rest of the story is available on YouTube.

For Palm Sunday

New Year Palate Cleanser

Via Smitty at the newly hosted Other McCain and House of Eratosthenes.

To help preface this story, you need to know that Monster Cable is the 500 pound gorilla in the room. The Microsoft of high end interconnects.

There are still a few other high end cable companies out there but MonCab (as the insiders like to say) is famous for using the courts to litigate the competition out of the way. They met their match when they sent a notice asking a little company called Blue Jeans Cable to stop making their product.

[Dear Monster Lawyers,][Audioholic's term, not mine or Mr. Kurt Denke's]
Let me begin by stating, without equivocation, that I have no interest whatsoever in infringing upon any intellectual property belonging to Monster Cable. Indeed, the less my customers think my products resemble Monster's, in form or in function, the better.

I am evaluating your claim that the connectors on certain Tartan brand products infringe Monster's design patents and trademarks. However, the information supplied with your letter is plainly inadequate to support a claim of infringement and so I am writing to you to ask for further information and clarification regarding your claims.
[. . .]
I will point out, though you are no doubt already well aware, that the gross morphology of the RCA plug is pretty well dictated by function. RCA plugs intended for soldering and assembly have certain attributes in common; their diameter is constrained by the need for the shell to fit over an internal set of solder points and cable clamp, and their length by the need to provide some room for cable end prep and attachment; they are generally radially symmetrical along the anterior/posterior axis owing to the need to accommodate both a round-profile cable and the round-profile RCA socket; the connector end is constrained by the standard dimensions of the RCA socket, and by the need, as the socket provides for no bayonet or screw attachment, to provide sufficient tension on insertion to maintain good mechanical and electrical contact; the barrel, grasped by the user for the purpose of insertion and removal, requires traction which is typically provided by raised or recessed rings, plastic inserts, knurling, or the like; and transition between the connector and the cable to which it is attached requires, in one form or another, a reduction in barrel size at the connector rear. It is my assumption, since you cite design patents only and no utility patents, that Monster Cable makes no claim here for any functional aspect of any of these designs; if I am wrong, please let me know what utility patents Monster Cable does hold, and what claims, if any, Monster asserts on the basis of those utility patents.
[. . .]
As for your requests for information, or for action, directed to me: I would remind you that it is you, not I, who are making claims; and it is you, not I, who must substantiate those claims. You have not done so.

I have seen Monster Cable take untenable IP positions in various different scenarios in the past, and am generally familiar with what seems to be Monster Cable's modus operandi in these matters. I therefore think that it is important that, before closing, I make you aware of a few points.

After graduating from the University of Pennsylvania Law School in 1985, I spent nineteen years in litigation practice, with a focus upon federal litigation involving large damages and complex issues. My first seven years were spent primarily on the defense side, where I developed an intense frustration with insurance carriers who would settle meritless claims for nuisance value when the better long-term view would have been to fight against vexatious litigation as a matter of principle. In plaintiffs' practice, likewise, I was always a strong advocate of standing upon principle and taking cases all the way to judgment, even when substantial offers of settlement were on the table. I am "uncompromising" in the most literal sense of the word. If Monster Cable proceeds with litigation against me I will pursue the same merits-driven approach; I do not compromise with bullies and I would rather spend fifty thousand dollars on defense than give you a dollar of unmerited settlement funds. As for signing a licensing agreement for intellectual property which I have not infringed: that will not happen, under any circumstances, whether it makes economic sense or not.
[. . .]
Let me be clear about this: there are only two ways for you to get anything out of me. You will either need to (1) convince me that I have infringed, or (2) obtain a final judgment to that effect from a court of competent jurisdiction. It may be that my inability to see the pragmatic value of settling frivolous claims is a deep character flaw, and I am sure a few of the insurance carriers for whom I have done work have seen it that way; but it is how I have done business for the last quarter-century and you are not going to change my mind. If you sue me, the case will go to judgment, and I will hold the court's attention upon the merits of your claims--or, to speak more precisely, the absence of merit from your claims--from start to finish. Not only am I unintimidated by litigation; I sometimes rather miss it.

I will also point out to you that if you do choose to undertake litigation, your "upside" is tremendously limited. If you somehow managed, despite the formidable obstacles in your way, to obtain a finding of infringement, and if you were successful at recovering a large licensing fee--say, ten cents per connector--as the measure of damages, your recovery to date would not reach four figures. On the downside, I will advance defenses which, if successful, will substantially undermine your future efforts to use these patents and marks to threaten others with these types of actions; as you are of course aware, it is easier today for your competitors to use collateral estoppel offensively than it ever has been before. Also, there is little doubt that making baseless claims of trade dress infringement and design patent infringement is an improper business tactic, which can give rise to unfair competition claims, and for a company of Monster's size, potential antitrust violations with treble damages and attorneys' fees.

I look forward to receiving the information requested and will review it promptly as soon as it is received.

Sincerely,

Kurt Denke

The Reason For The Season

Merry Christmas.

From the Gospel of Luke.

1 And it came to pass in those days that a decree went out from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be registered.
2 This census first took place while Quirinius was governing Syria.
3 So all went to be registered, everyone to his own city.
4 Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judea, to the city of David, which is called Bethlehem, because he was of the house and lineage of David,
5 to be registered with Mary, his betrothed wife,[a] who was with child.
6 So it was, that while they were there, the days were completed for her to be delivered.
7 And she brought forth her firstborn Son, and wrapped Him in swaddling cloths, and laid Him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.
Glory in the Highest

8 Now there were in the same country shepherds living out in the fields, keeping watch over their flock by night.
9 And behold,[b] an angel of the Lord stood before them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were greatly afraid.
10 Then the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid, for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy which will be to all people.
11 For there is born to you this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord.
12 And this will be the sign to you: You will find a Babe wrapped in swaddling cloths, lying in a manger.”
13 And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying:

14 “ Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, goodwill toward men!”